


good morning blondie

by undread



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Borderline Personality Disorder, Intrusive Thoughts, M/M, Smoking, Splitting, author also has bpd, hand holding, hand holding is so intimate, i was gonna make a joke abt how scandalous it is but yall really dont write hand holding???, it be like that, mondo has bpd, uhm anyway, why isnt there a tag for hand holding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:48:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27963284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undread/pseuds/undread
Summary: i'll make you a cup of coffee, but i'll pour more into mine
Relationships: Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo
Comments: 3
Kudos: 84





	good morning blondie

**Author's Note:**

> uh this is dummy short and quick cause my bpd has been giving me hell and if i don't put my problems on mondo, what am i supposed to do with them?

Being alive sucks ass. Being in love sucks ass, too, but it doesn't. It does. Whatever, love is fucking weird, more than anything.

Kiyotaka is a nice kid. Better than that, actually, he's the best damn man Mondo's ever met. He's determined, passionate, he cares about everything so strongly and believes in his loved ones just as strongly. Mondo loves that about him, he thinks. There's nothing about Kiyotaka that Mondo doesn't like, really. Despite that, the biker can't help but feel pissed off at the other. There's no reason for it- Kiyotaka is an incredibly comforting person, his voice, the way he moves, everything about him makes Mondo fall even more in love. No reason. Still, those feelings of anger, rage, violence, they all remained and were completely out of Mondo's control, lacing up with his feelings of love and care. Like flipping a light switch on and off repeatedly before just leaving it in the middle. He hates that he can't control how he feels, he hates that he doesn't _know_ how he feels. Something is wrong with him at his very core and he can't fix it and he hates it, he hates himself.

It's bright outside, not a cloud to be seen. Kiyotaka would probably be happy, enjoying the sun, but Mondo didn't really give a shit. The light kinda just hurt his eyes. Kiyotaka still slept gently next to him, his mouth ever so slightly open, chest rising and falling gently. _Kiss him,_ one thought appeared, _push him off the bed,_ appeared another. _Wake him up. Fuck him._ This happened every day. Mondo barely noticed it anymore. Still, it pissed him off. Kiyotaka pissed him off? He isn't sure. He'll go with that, Kiyotaka pissed him off.

Mondo lit a cigarette and inhaled sharply, Kiyotaka still sleeping peacefully next to him. Normally, the prefect wouldn't allow smoking in the bed, no matter what. Mondo didn't get what he had against it, and right then he didn't really care. Fuck Kiyotaka Ishimaru. No reason. Kiyotaka wasn't awake anyway, Mondo could do whatever the hell he wanted, later consequences be damned.

The biker had to practically drag himself out of bed. Moving was a lot of effort he didn't always want to, or feel like exerting, but he had to, he guessed. He turned on the coffee maker and walked over to the balcony. He didn't drink that shit, but Kiyotaka would appreciate it. He's mad at Kiyotaka, but he still loves him. He's pretty sure. Solid ninety percent sure. Whatever. The balcony is pretty shitty and small, barely big enough for two people. Mondo inhales the outside air heavily. It's slightly chilly, not too bad yet though. Mondo fucking hates it anyway, he decides, cause he's mad at everything right now. No reason. He goes back inside and sees Kiyotaka rubbing his eyes, walking out of their bedroom. _Good morning,_ he greets, pulling Mondo into a hug. The biker's heart races a mile a minute and once again he's wondering if he loves or hates this man.

Kiyotaka pours a cup full of coffee and doesn't both to pour another one. He knows Mondo doesn't like coffee, but Mondo's a little upset he didn't at least ask. "Were you smoking in bed again?" He asks instead, sipping from his cup gently.

Mondo shoves his hands in his pockets. "Does it really fucking matter?"

"I asked you not to," Kiyotaka states simply, and he sounds disappointed. Mondo suddenly feels a lot worse about what he did, like a child who got caught with candy. "Please don't do that anymore," the hall monitor asks, and that's all he ever really asked of Mondo. _Please do this, please don't do that._ It wasn't hard to just listen to him, Mondo just refused to, and for what? To feel cool? To show just how much of a badass he was, disrespecting his boyfriend, to no one? _What the fuck's wrong with him?_ Mondo can't do anything right, he can't just listen, he loves Kiyotaka but he's been nothing but awful to him. Despite that, Kiyotaka reaches out to hold Mondo's hand gently. Mondo doesn't deserve the contact, he doesn't deserve Kiyotaka to even look at him, he deserves to be thrown out-

"I love you," Kiyotaka says softly, squeezing Mondo's hand. Kiyotaka does love him, even when Mondo doesn't know how he's feeling, even when he wants nothing more than to break someone's teeth and hopefully his own hand, Kiyotaka is there for him, Kiyotaka loves him.

"I love you too."

**Author's Note:**

> alright time to work on leon content :)


End file.
